This is a dare for all of the women out there, who feel trapped in the mundane, and unable to explain, why their feet won’t move forward.
There’s a quote that says, “I always wonder why birds stay in the same place when they can fly anywhere on the earth. Then I ask myself the same question.”
And today, as I’m sitting in this tiny room that I pay for, yet never live in, I wonder why I do the same.
I’ve been learning how to separate my anxiety about being alone and my lust for it. On the one hand, the magic of colorful cities and landscapes pulls at my heart.
And on the other…well, I’ve forgotten.
Why are we still here – near enough to wish for it, but too far away to run.
Who am I? It’s a question that has been wondered and asked for days, and years and millennium. And yet, no one has come up with an answer,
Perhaps it’s because there is no sure power that ensures that we leave this earth feeling more hope than helplessness. Did we do enough?
I have seen rolling hills that stretch farther than my eyes can imagine, and while standing there, my heart and mind beat in tandem,
I always knew I would walk back to this tiny room that I pay for, yet never live in. Why?
But maybe that’s the truth of it all, life is a debit card that we’re eternally swiping, the balance continually falling, until we’re holding our breath – just hoping that we’ll see the word, “Approved.”
Approval is the killer of dreams, and sometimes I just want to scream while walking down the street, just to watch people look at me.
Although… I learned long ago, that looking isn’t seeing, and yelling isn’t the same as screaming, so maybe it’s that I want to yell from the mountain-tops, “IS THIS ENOUGH?”
Are we enough?
This confusion used to feel so far away, like it stayed at bay just lapping against a great American shore, playing with our faith in humanity and whispering “In God we trust,”
Lust for life. Lust for living. For standing at the very tip of the ocean and feeling the wind coat your lips with a salty kiss. To taste the sea, to glory in the sun rising over thousand year-old ruins.
Have the courage to push back. Ask more questions and search for more answers.
Buy plane tickets, and bus tickets, and train tickets and explore cities and towns and countries, and streets. Don’t be afraid to take a step out your front door and let life sweep you away.
Filled with life.
If bravery ever needed a voice, it is yours.