wanderlust – Page 8 – Darkk Horse Travel

One Glass Of Unicorn Blood: Shaken, Not Stirred

Published on October 13, 2016November 8, 2016 by Emilee1 Comment

If I was Voldemort, art would be my unicorn blood.

Okay, okay. Kinda gross and sort of dramatic. But it’s true!

Before you walk away gagging, let me explain:

Art is my life blood and keeps me sustained.

And while it doesn’t require a life long curse, it does require a lot of sacrifice. How often is that the case, though? The things we love, the things we are passionate, what makes everything ‘just feel right’ comes at a price.

Adulting.

Here I am, sitting the morning after a show I painted at, and I can barely keep my eyes open. I slept a full 7 hours, but this is one of those moments when I’m blatantly aware that I am no longer the college freshman who did homework until midnight, then sprung out of bed at 6am for work the next morning.

Lately, I’ve been VERY aware of my own limitations.

And let me tell you, it’s a feeling that’s pretty upsetting and kind of annoying. I hate being limited. I hate not being able to do every. single. thing. that pops into my head. I want to travel everywhere, live on Twitter, blog everyday, paint everything, work 80 hours a week and still have time to maintain healthy relationships and exercise 7 times a week.

Wouldn’t that be nice? If only I wasn’t human.

The reality is – I have limits. And I don’t think enough of us admit that. I’m not talking about being lazy, so don’t think leaning back in a pile of potato chips on the couch, while streaming soap operas, is what I’m talking about.

I’m talking about good ole-fashioned lack of ability to have more hours than life provides.

And while I know you gentlemen feel this way, as well – I’m going to call out the pressure that we, as women, feel to be EVERYTHING.

A lot of the time it feels like I need to be the perfect career woman, the perfect blogger, the perfect girlfriend, the perfect daughter the perfect roommate, the perfect friend, the perfect writer, the perfect editor. Oh, and also volunteer every weekend, be devastatingly fit, and have all my student loans paid off like 10 years ago.

(NOTE: I wasn’t even in college 10 years ago)

The point is, this is INSANE.

And I’m calling it.

There is no way to live up to this constant standard of perfection, and while I do very strongly agree that healthy life = happy life. Let’s reevaluate what that means.

Not to compare the U.S. to France, again, buuuuuuuuut…

In France women are not perfect mothers. They don’t have to be, and honestly I don’t think they want to be. Motherhood is just one piece (like being a vegetarian or a yogi) that makes up who they are.

In France there are days and days of vacation time when people literally sit around and “do nothing.” Or, to be specific, they lay around in gardens and on lawns and in front of amazing buildings that look like movie backgrounds.

In France you work so that you have more time to enjoy your life. Not so that you can pay back student loan gods who hold you in shackles for 40 years.

Obviously there are problems with any society, and France is not immune. But the overarching culture is sometimes storybook-esque.

Sometimes that drove me crazy, when I was living there. But now, I think I’m starting to get it.

I’m starting to understand that there’s no way to win in this American system.

Last weekend I got to hear some of the most successful people I can think of talk about their success, and guess what? They still don’t feel like they’ve “made it.”

Why? Because we’re holding ourselves to an impossible standard.

Okay, now the happy part:

We don’t have to live this way. We don’t have to do everything and be everything. In fact, I don’t believe we were ever meant to. Let’s refocus for a minute.

One of my favorite quotes is by author Courtney E. Martin, who wrote a fantastic book called Perfect Girls, Starving Daughters: The Frightening New Normalcy of Hating Your Body.

“We are a generation of young women who were told we could do anything and instead heard that we had to be everything.”

Every time I read this quote, it’s like a slap in the face and a breath of fresh air.

This has been resonating with me a lot, lately, as I try to tackle 60 hour work weeks while maintaining a semi-normal life outside of my 3/4 jobs. It’s not easy. But I do my best, and I’ve decided that that is enough. I might not be producing my best ever art, or updating my social media/Etsy more than once a month but that’s okay. I’m still pressing forward.

Can I get an amen?

Okay, but really. I AM a huge advocate of hard work. But I also think it’s really important that we realize — we are not robots. We’re divinely created temples. And temples are places to be valued and loved.

So, today, wherever you are in life, that you’re reading this, just know that it’s okay not to have “it all together.”

I give you permission to be tired. To be a little messy. To be a little human. And to love your life, and yourself a little more.

Love extravagantly. Be kind to one another. And…

Why I Cut ‘Jealous’ Out Of My Travel Vocabulary

Published on September 28, 2016August 11, 2017 by Emilee12 Comments

Last week I bought a plane ticket to Europe. In January I’m going to be taking a trip through 5 countries and honestly I’m so excited to be going to my second “home,” again.

With every trip/travel experience I’ve taken, I come across people who say that they’re “jealous.” And while I know it’s not generally meant negatively, I wanted to have a quick housekeeping talk about it.Obviously I’m not immune to the green monster that is jealousy, but I’ve noticed this conversation happening a lot, lately. I had to stop and think: Do we know what we’re saying?

Note for the love of linguistics: When we say, “I’m jealous!” what we’re actually saying is that we’re afraid of losing something.

“Jealousy is an anticipatory emotion. It seeks to prevent loss,” said Ralph Hupka, Professor of Psychology, Emeritus at California State University at Long Beach.

Despite the common misuse of the word (what’s new? #English) what we generally mean is that we’re envious of what the other person has. For this piece we’ll move forwards with the common knowledge that we, as a society, use the words synonymously, and that ‘jealous’ is interchangeable with the meaning of envy.

And now, back to your regular program/rant…

Why am I even talking about this? Well, in the travel community I think it can be easy to look over at someone else’s accomplishments (I’m lookin’ at you Mr. 153 countries in 2 years) and feel a certain tinge of green.

When you see that someone bought a plane ticket to a place you’ve always wanted to go, your initial reaction, as you’re sitting in your cubicle typing, probably isn’t going to be to high-five them. But guess what? You should. Why? Because that’s how we build community. You have to CELEBRATE.

As a woman, I think a lot of us grew up being pitted against each other. For some reason we’re supposed to be in competition with every other woman on the planet, and we’re supposed to sit in a corner moping, if we don’t sing like Taylor Swift, and have moves like Beyoncé.

When have we EVER been encouraged to throw a party when one of us kicks ass and conquers?!

Three years ago, after a rather tragic and heart breaking experience (#storyforanothertime) I decided to stop using the word “jealous” in my conversations with people (and to be honest, even in my mental conversations).

Why was it that when those people accomplished their dreams, I felt like I needed to protect myself from losing my own. Sound ridiculous? Sound familiar?

Hint: That’s not how it works.

I started my little vocab experiment when I realized how terrible I felt after I said I was jealous of someone. Even if it was meant to be light-hearted, it didn’t feel right. And generally speaking (unless the person was a smug-ass) I noticed that nobody was reacting positively to me expressing my jealousy.

At first it was really hard, I’m not going to lie. And to be more honest, it still is. Sometimes the words bubble up to my lips before I even get a chance to think about them and I have to push them back down. It’s a bit like trying to get a rolled sleeping bag back in its bag.

The Results: What I noticed when I stopped using “jealous” to describe my feelings is that my mindset changed. I started to replace stagnant thoughts with questions like, “How can I do that?”
A few years ago I wanted to do a lot of things that I didn’t have the courage to do. Mainly because I spent hours on Pintrest/travel websites drooling over what other people were posting.

That’s no way to live.

When you start to ask yourself “how” you can make things happen, you start to open doors, and you start pushing yourself forward. Believe me, the universe knows when you’ve opened yourself up to new experiences. You might even land in another country, attempting to speak somewhat fluent French.

I’m just saying. It’s happened before.

The part that breaks my heart is that society is (generally) not on our side. Spend 5 minutes looking at ads on your TV and you’ll quickly see that we, as Americans, are constantly in competition with each other. MAKE the grass on your side greener so the Jones’ (and everyone else!) has to drool in envy. Go on a Caribbean cruise so your coworkers are envious (not to spend time with your family, don’t be ridiculous). The list goes on and on.

Fight it.

Get off your couch and go DO something. Buy a plane ticket, or start saving to buy one. And stop saying you can’t. Before I really even knew how to budget (or anything about travel), I would put away the tiniest amount of money every month, daring not to hope. When I finally had the guts to buy a plane ticket I had the backup that I needed. Literally EVERY SINGLE person told me not to, but I did anyway. Why? Because that was MY dream.

And now it’s time for yours to start.

Jealousy is a stagnant emotion. It doesn’t move you forward. It’s like one of those stupid gumdrop traps in Candyland that makes you lose a turn.

Stop jealously looking at what others are doing, and start making things happen in your own life. You’re so much more powerful than you know.

Review: Pilbara Au Pair Service

Published on September 21, 2016December 14, 2016 by EmileeLeave a comment

Let’s talk becoming an au pair.

I get a lot of people telling me how amazing the whole au pair journey sounds, and I’m always a little bit hesitant to allow them to romanticize my experience. When I was an au pair I signed up using an online service that was great for connecting with a family, but offered about the same amount of the security that a Craigslist purchase does.

After a mess with my first host family, and a less than ideal experience with my second, I would have loved to have worked with an agency that had supported me.

I don’t write very many posts reviewing services, but this comes from one that a close friends has used, and which, I feel, represents a business that cares as much about the well being of their au pairs as they do their host families.

The service specializes in western Australia, so unfortunately they’re not global, but if you’re thinking about going down the path of becoming an au pair, I can definitely recommend them!

The best part? If you’ve already gone through other avenues to find an au pair position, this service will also help you work out agreements, contracts or just having support in your current position! Click HERE for more information! Or check out this FAQ Sheet !

You can also check out Pilbara Au Pair Services on social media: Twitter, Instagram, Facebook

You Can Call Me Pippi Longstocking

Published on September 18, 2016December 14, 2016 by Emilee1 Comment

pippihorse

I’ve always been in love with gingers.

I idolized them as a child. Friends, singers, actors, book characters – it didn’t matter. There are so many, it borders on obsession (I have a Pintrest board and boyfriend to prove it). I collect gingers. Sue me.

Looking back, there was one particularly poignant character that I was always obsessed with. In fact, I pretty much wanted to be her: Pippi Longstocking.

Now, if you’re not familiar with the story of Pippi, here’s a quick run-through: Pippi is a 9 year old pirate’s daughter (which explains so much about what happens to all of those kids) who lives alone in a mansion (with the exception of her spotted horse and pet monkey) and usually can be found with her hair done in two braids – sticking straight out. She does periodically see her father, so he can give her treasure and coins for her to live off of, but mostly she runs around having adventures with the village kids.

She goes places. She does things.

Since I was a kid, I’ve always wanted to go places.

I’m honestly not even sure how the whole “grown up” thing happened… because the last thing I remember, I was 10 years old.

Little dreamer. How was I supposed to know that traveling would become such a big part of my life? How could I have known that I would be able to take those adventures I dreamt about, while I was sitting on the couch in my childhood living room?

But it did. And I got to. And I wouldn’t trade my life for the world.

One of the main things I loved about Pippi Longstocking was that in the 1969 Swedish (English dub) videos we had, she took these other two village kids with her on adventures. Like in a hot air balloon. She didn’t need someone to give her permission. She ruled her life. She made her decisions. She was limitless and bold.

My birthday is this on Monday and I’ve been thinking a lot about what’s next for me. I’ll be tipping in the direction of 30, this year (which is crazy to think!) so I feel like I need to rewrite a list of goals to conquer.

So much has happened in the past 5 years, and so many dreams have been fulfilled.

So what’s next?

ee831714772c4c5cb5ebc7a9944fe5fd Well, as much as I’d love to give you a sneak peek into my future, I actually have no idea what this next year will hold. I might be taking another big trip. I might be going back to school to pursue higher education. I might write a book. I might paint a mural. Who knows? Maybe all, or maybe none.

But I think, at this point, it’s more about dreaming of new tomorrows.

I met someone once who told me I seemed younger than I was because I haven’t lost hope in my life. A comment which was met by the rest of the group nodding in agreement. But hey, why have we all lost hope?
I refuse to stop dreaming of new goals and new ambitions.

For 26 I want to dare more, dream more, work harder, reach my goals and keep living like crazy.
And I want to take you all in my hot air balloon, with me.

Dream with me. Whatever it is that’s holding you back from pursuing that little whisper of a dream in your heart, I dare you to unclench your fists, and ask the question of, “What if?”

Something I’m learning more and more is that the things that I regret, in my past, are the missed opportunities. Because, even the failures resulted in helping to mold and build me into someone who is so much stronger and so much more daring.

But I feel like most of the time I’ve known what I should be doing. The hard part is listening to that voice. That little tug on your heart. That little whisper of your soul. Don’t ignore it! Who knows what the future holds. But I do know that I’m fabulously excited for the 26th year of my life.

And lastly, I leave you all, my darlings, with the English version of the 1969 intro song to one of my favorite childhood movies. Enjoy.

4 Ways To Travel Without Leaving Home

Published on September 5, 2016November 16, 2016 by Emilee7 Comments

What if I told you that you can travel without ever leaving your neighborhood?

Traveling is a big part of my life. Obviously. I spend hours each week blogging, researching and Tweeting about it. But the reality of the situation is that not everyone can just throw some stuff in a bag and hop on a plane, which is something I’ve been very fortunate to have done on multiple occasions. Right now, however, I’m in a bit of a hiatus for travel, or at least long trips, because I’m paying back the student loan gods and getting settled after a year of living in one of the most expensive cities in the world.

But back to you. I know there are a lot of you who love travel, but may not be able to right now, so I thought I would share some of my tips for curing (at least temporarily) the travel blues. Ready? Okay, here we go:

Postcards

You know, those tiny little scraps of paper that you pray will go where they’re supposed to because, let’s face it, there’s no return address. Yep, those. I love postcards and I probably always will. When I was a kid I used to had a penpal, and that’s probably where my love for snail mail originates from, but I think I also just like being able to talk to people without talking to them (if I’m honest) #introvert.

The best part of sending/receiving postcards is that you don’t have travel somewhere in order to send them. No joke! Try out a website like Postcrossing to send and receive postcards from people all over the world. How does this work?

1. You go to Postcrossing and sign up.

2. They send you the addresses of a few people to test your commitment.

3. Once those people receive your postcards (which you’ve written a little code from the website, on) you start getting postcards and so forth and so on.

One time I got a postcard from Germany that led me to making a new friend in the U.S. and it was awesome. You never know what you’re gonna get!

The wall of my bedroom in Paris.

Read

I know, I know, now I sound like
5th grade. But it’s TRUE! Reading is an amazing way to experience other cultures and places without ever having to leave your house (literally, just order them on Amazon – you don’t have to ever leave…except maybe health reasons).The best part of books (other than that they’re relatively cheap) is that they can actually inspire you to travel to other places, and make your trips more fun.
Right now I’m reading the Outlander series, and I’m seriously considering going to Scotland just so that I can visit all of the places. It makes you appreciate a place so much more when you’re able to associate happy reading memories with the real life places.

Have a Penpal

One of the best ways to get to know people who are different than yourself is to do just that…get to know people who are different from you. I’ve had a penpal for most of my childhood and again for the past year. She lives in Liverpool, England and due to the crazy of each letter taking 1-2 weeks to get from point A to point B, we don’t talk too often, but it’s the most exciting thing in the world to get a letter in the mail from England once a month!

If you’re still a little skeptical that pen pals are for kids, take a peek at the website that I used to get mine: Letter Writer’s Alliance. They’re dedicated to making sure snail mail stays in business, and it’s a pretty awesome community. Not only can you get matched with another member (lifetime membership is $5) but you can also check out their awesome letter writing merch (not required to write, just awesome) as well as local meet-ups and other events.

Social Media Groups

You know what they say: the people you surround yourself with influence your behavior. The best part of social media is that you can choose who you’re around and gain inspiration that way! Obviously, Twitter is my biggest inspiration with all +5,000 of my travel buds, but I also love Facebook groups, as well. Instagram is (obv) a really good source as well, but I’ve never really been in to Instagram, so that’s not as much my scene. Try looking at these Facebook Groups (or even join a couple!) for travel inspiration galore.

Travelettes : Launched in 2009, Travelettes is an online magazine/ travelblog/ network for and from girls who love to travel.

Nomadness Travel Tribe: The Nomad•ness Travel Tribe, created by Evita Robinson, stemming from her travel series Nomad•ness TV, is an online social community of travelers and expats all around the world. In the Tribe, they come together to share stories, advice, dos and don’ts, in an interpersonal setting. The majority of our members are bridged by an urban background.

Americans in France:

Irish Central: IrishCentral is America’s number one news website for Irish news with over 3.5 million readers a month. (Also one of my favorite newsletters to get!)

Mama Loves Paris: Brilliant ideas, inspiration, fun and fab photography for families living or loving Paris life.

Jetting Around: Jetting Around by Pola Henderson is a blog dedicated to cities and their culture. In addition to writing, Pola hosts a weekly city travel discussion on Twitter called #JAchat (Fridays, 1pm ET) and international networking events for travelers, JA Café: Travel Talk Over Coffee.

Travel Noire: Travel Noire is a digital publishing platform that creates tools and resources for the unconventional traveler.

The Exploress: Inspire | Share | Educate | Together we are a global community of young, creative and adventurous women who share a burning desire to travel.

A Geek Guide To Vancouver, BC: Part 2

Published on August 29, 2016December 25, 2016 by EmileeLeave a comment

Okay, so after I wrote up my last post I realized that I had a few more things to say: like that THERE ARE MORE GEEKY THINGS IN VANCOUVER TO TALK ABOUT! And these things I’m super excited to share! So, here’s the part 2 to my post from this weekend. Who knew Vancouver could have so many geeky things – I actually ran out of time to explore them all!

If you have anything that I missed, feel free to let me know in the comment section, below!

TV shows filming in Vancouver:

Obviously there are tons of shows that are being filmed in Canada, but most notably for me are the ones listed below:

Arrow (currently)
Flash (currently)
iZombie (currently)
DC Legends (currently)
Once Upon A Time In Wonderland (not current, but one of my favorite shows of all-time)
Once Upon A Time (currently)
Supernatural (currently)

The best part? You can follow along with WHERE these shows (and more!) are filming by stalking them with this handy guide!

Where To Find Some Geeky Reads:

Vancouver Public Library

The Vancouver library was built as a structure inspired by the colosseum, and it’s quite a spectacle. While I was a little bit skeptical from the outside, the inside of the library was stunning and SEVEN stories high! I’m not gonna lie, I felt a little sick when looking down through the all glass windows that surround one side. Every type of book you could imagine was there including some great titles that coincide with geek favorites, such as Game of Thrones and Lord of the Rings.

Albion Books

If you go to a bookstore for happy-go-lucky employees then you may want to stop by your local Barnes and Nobel, but if you’re there for the books this second hand book stop is amazing. Not only did I find a first edition copy of Outlander there for $5, but I also found some beautiful vintage Charles Dickens works for about $10. Some prices were weirdly high, but overall I think this is a great stop for book lovers. The best part? There are three other book stores within a two block distance that you can also walk to!

A Geek Guide To Vancouver, BC: Part 1

Published on August 28, 2016December 25, 2016 by Emilee1 Comment

If there’s one thing I like to do, it’s find out geeky things about a city. Remember that time I uncovered a Sherlock Holmes society in San Francisco, or when I visited every major spot in Paris that was from “Midnight in Paris”? Or what about the Star Wars x-wing in Denver? Game of Thrones castle in N. Ireland? Or the site in Ireland of the huge Braveheart battle? Yeah, yeah, I love geeky things. So, it makes sense for me to join the two things together while I’m on the road.

This weekend we’re spending some time celebrating our anniversary in Vancouver, and it’s been such a fun trip. Of course, any time I come to a new city I have to find out EVERYTHING GEEKY about it, so here is a compilation of my findings from day 1 in British Columbia.

Famous Geek Icons from Vancouver:

Alexander Ludwig: It wasn’t until today that I realized that this hunk was from both the Hunger Games AND one of my favorite shows, Vikings. I really had hopes that I could correct the grammar on Vikings based off of the actors being Scandinavian, but nope. This boy’s from good ‘ole British Columbia. Luckily, he’s still fun to watch being a Viking bad ass on the show, and it’s nice to know we both hail from the west.

Michael J. Fox: Blast from the past, and Back to the Future, it’s true that this Hollywood icon isn’t as active in the geek world right now, for obvious reasons, but he’s a geek idol, nonetheless. Back to the Future was a series that molded and shaped my childhood and I’m happy to find out he grew up not too far from me.
Ryan Reynolds: Obviously most famous, at the moment, for his portrayal of the Marvel bad-boy Deadpool, Ryan Reynolds has been a favorite from Just Friends to The Proposal. In case you (and half the geek world) are trying to still forget – he was also DC’s Green Lantern, and appeared in the Wolverine, as well.

Hayden Christensen: Personally, I prefer to think of him as the actor who brought Jumper to life, but we do have to credit him for some of the weirdest Star Wars movies, as well. To be fair, it wasn’t entirely his fault that they’re the embarrassment of the geek community – the script writers weren’t doing to hot, either.

Shawn Ashmore: I may or may not have had a crush on him when I saw the first Xmen movie (I was like 12) but how could you not!? Him and Rogue were the perfect couple and then she went running after Logan – what was she thinking!? Anyway. He only kind of counts because he was raised in Alberta. But he was born in Vancouver, so they still claim him as their own.
Colbie Smulders: To be honest, I still don’t even know her Avengers character name, but she’s awesome and one of the few female characters in the movies who doesn’t have powers. She can also be found on Agents of Shield, a show that, for the life of me, I can’t find time to watch, mainly because I’ve heard some good and a lot of not so good about it.

Somewhere to grab some geeky books:

I love used bookstores. In fact, I love pretty much any place I can get a good deal on a good read, and this morning that was the first place I plopped off to. I was really excited to score on a book by Diana Gabaldon, who writes the Outlander series. I learned about the books via the STARZ show, but I’ve started to read the books and I adore them, as well. The book I found was an accompaniment to the series, called “The Outlandish Companion” which goes into details about the series and why Diana chose certain aspects to put in/leave out. It also has commentary and helpful additions, such as genealogies, to help out along the reading of the first four books. Overall, I’m really happy with the find. Especially since it was only about $15 (with the conversion rate). Somehow I always end up finding the heaviest books while I’m traveling and this one weighs in at about 600 pages to keep the trend going.

My stop today was at Book Warehouse, which is located at 632 West Broadway, Vancouver, BC V5Z 1G1

Geek places to eat:

Storm Crow Ale House: This is an updated/more contemporary version of the Storm Crow Tavern, which is amazing in its own right. We kind of accidentally stumbled upon this one, not actually realizing there were two in Vancouver, and really loved the atmosphere and the people who were hanging out in there. I actually was really happy to be hanging out mid-day because a lot of people were just hanging out there, playing games and having good food. I would definitely recommend. Click HERE for the website.

Storm Crow Tavern: This Tavern is also a real treat, and is decked out with memorabilia, geek art, books and a giant octo-monster head. And they also have tons of games to choose from playing. The best part is that the food is also amazing. I had a cod sandwich and some raspberry rhubarb crumble for dessert. It was sublime. Definitely stop by this spot if you’re a sci-fi and fantasy fan. Click HERE for the website.

Memoirs of A French Au Pair: 1 Year Back In The U.S.

Published on June 14, 2016November 8, 2016 by Emilee8 Comments

This time last year I was packing my suitcases and planning on getting the hell out of France. I was so over it. I was over my job. Over my living situation and over the idea that I had made the right decision moving there in the first place. In short, I was over it (and everything that ‘it’ encompassed).

If I sound like an angsty teen here, I apologize. And then I unapologize. Because life is hard sometimes, and we have a right to look up to the heavens and shout, “WHAT WERE YOU THINKING BRINGING ME HERE!?” There was a lot of that when I lived in France. And that’s okay. Because I don’t believe that God wants subservient robots and I strongly believe that he likes us having real dialog with him. Even when things are hard. Especially when things are hard.

When I moved to France I thought it was going to solve all of my problems. I was sick of seeing people get engaged/married or posting baby pics on Facebook and I decided to DO something with my life. So I quit my job, bought a plane ticket and went (way harder than that, but you get the point). Then the first bad thing happened… and then another. And another and another and another and finally I started to wonder if I had made the right decision? Had I done something with my life, or had I ruined the perfectly good life I had already had?

Risk.

I’m not usually a very risky person. In fact, I would go as far as to say I adore being comfortable and secure. I don’t gamble. I don’t really like taking chances. I’ve ordered the exact same flavor of bubble tea at the exact same place for six years. It’s who I am. I like knowing what I’m getting into. So when I felt the extreme push in my life to move to France, I felt so certain that it was a divine intervention. Let’s be real, it pretty much had to be.

Fast forward nine months and my little idealistic dream boat had been battered and thrown into the shoals. It wasn’t painted and glowing with idealistic promises, anymore. That shit (sorry, mom) was borderline Titanic-post-iceberg status. All I wanted to do was to run away. So I did. And I’m okay with that decision, but I what I did next was wrong.

I tried to ignore and repress and never ever ever think about France.

In fact, I can honestly say I’ve been almost entirely removed from my experience up until the last couple of weeks. It’s very rare that I’ll talk about my experiences there. In fact, I basically don’t talk about that year, at all. At first I told myself that it was because I was too busy or that I had too much on my plate. But the reality was that I didn’t want to have to think about the fact that I had failed at something (or, at least, my definition of failure). France was not magical, fun, beautiful, a fairytale or anything like Audrey Hepburn described it. That’s a tourists dream. Not this expat’s reality.

And at the end of it all I’m still not sure that I have an answer for, “What I learned.” I know that I’ve become a much different person, because I can see it in the reflection of the people who were closest to me, before I moved. Since those changes were gradual they’re much harder for me to personally distinguish.

But I have changed. And I can feel it.

This year back in the U.S. has been one of the most hectic and crazy that I’ve ever had. At times I’ve felt like I was drowning in an ocean, too overwhelming to overcome. Other times I’ve felt so overwhelmingly loved and supported. Overall, this has been a year of drastic highs and earth-shattering lows.

I can’t even believe that one year has already passed. On the one hand it feels like no time at all, and on the other I feel like five years has passed in the course of one. Such is life.

It’s taken almost the entirety of the year for me to finally start having some pieces fall into place. A lot is still up in the air, but things will hopefully click, soon. Over the past year I’ve been bouncing between more jobs than I can count, I’ve moved four times, and I’ve been dutifully pay off the debt (Paris is hella expensive) that I incurred while living abroad (halfway done!) in addition to my student loans (also halfway there). If there’s one thing I learned in France, it’s that I NEVER want to have to think about student loans again, and the sooner they’re gone the better. I hate how “normal” it is for people my age to have tens of thousands of dollars in debt before they really even start their adult lives. It’s basically nonexistent in so many European countries, and I cannot wait to be done with them for good.

The highlights of this year? I’ve gone to three conventions, which was something I had placed on my bucket list while I was living in France. I’ve taken one trip out of the country (Scotland, Ireland, England) and three smaller trips (soon to be four) within the U.S. I’ve seen Riverdance (twice!) and Lord of the Dance, I started a Star Wars painting that will someday be awesome, and I started the process of writing/putting together a comic book with one of my friends. All in all this year has been so incredibly hard, but I’m so thankful for the friends who have held my hand, wrapped me in wool blankets with cups of tea and given me comic books to help me through.

Moving back from France was a really hard decision. It was a hit to my pride (because I honestly didn’t think I would ever come back) and it was a life lesson in how much I actually do need others to make it through this crazy circus called life. Today I was looking at pictures from just two years ago and it’s insane to think about how different things are, now. I was a completely different person. From my ideals, to the way that I approach life, I can honestly say that basically nothing is the same. Maybe this transformation will prove beneficial in the upcoming year. Maybe it won’t. But the point of this long-winded tale is: Fail you might, but try you must.

So here’s to one year of making shit work (sorry for the swearing, mom). The past few years have been just about anything other than what I thought they would be. And that’s OKAY. I give you all permission to be confused, and angry, and elated and to feel torn in a hundred different directions. Life doesn’t have to be exactly what we plan, we just have to be ready to keep moving forward, not matter what is thrown our way.

Review: Macleod’s Scottish Pub

Published on June 13, 2016September 28, 2016 by EmileeLeave a comment

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Let me tell you about a story about a girl who missed Scotland and never thought she’d find anything close in comparison to the food she had eaten there. Fish and chips were her favorite food in all of the world, but she never thought she would find anything close to the glory of the British Isles (and Ireland – duh). Then she stumbled upon this place: Macleod’s Scottish Pub.

Can I just tell you: This place has the best fish and chips that I’ve ever had in the United States, and the only thing that comes even close is 4,000 miles away. I don’t know what the recipe is, and to be honest I don’t really care. If you have any self respect for fish and chips (and a bunch of o 6c3acf2b75b472277fb7715662d54404 ther yummy British inspired dishes) make your way to this bar.

The music, the vibe. We didn’t even know how to handle how great a time we had. The service was great, the food was amazing and I’m so happy to have found a nearby spot to help with those “homesick” days (aka every day that I just feel like I need buy a plane ticket to Europe). The best part? The price. My plate, steaming with chips (for you Americans, that means fries) and a giant burger filled with in-house tarter sauce and a hearty size piece of fried and battered line-caught cod. All this accompanied by a tall glass of the best Lemonade ever. Total cost? $15. Come. On.

Ordered: Fish Burger and Chips, Lemonade

Where: 5200 BALLARD AVE NW / SEATTLE / WA 98107

Went: Friday June 10th, 2016

Wifi: Psh. You won’t even look/care.

Reservation Needed: No

Website: http://macleodsballard.com/

Notes: There is a Foosball table upstairs. If you’re not feeling up to a bar vibe, you can also experience a more diner-like experience next door.

I went back, again, and tried the Shepards Pie. Another beautiful dish that honestly was the best version I’ve ever had. A must try!

How To Staycation In Seattle

Published on May 31, 2016September 14, 2016 by EmileeLeave a comment

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It’s a pretty universal fact that Memorial Day Weekend is synonymous with taking camping trips and vacations in celebration. But this year we decided to stay put while everyone else travelled, which I know is shocking. But our weekend actually turned out to be such a great success, that I thought I would share our “staycation” details so that others looking to enjoy the beauty that is Seattle can, as well.

We started off our weekend with the greatest vacation of all: sleep. I think a lot of people underestimate how relaxing sleeping in really can be. So, rather than partying all night long on Friday we watched a quick episode of Vikings, and went to bed early. The best.

Breakfast/Brunch

If you’re ever looking for the perfect brunch, stop by Morsel on 15th in Ballard. Not only is this spot one of our new favorites, but all of the recipes are made on site, and you can taste the difference. I ate the “Fast Break” (without the cheddar) and it was so good, I literally couldn’t stop eating it. What makes it more than “just” a breakfast sandwich is the homemade tomato jam, which (to be honest) I was skeptical of. Shame on me. It was perfection.

Daytime Activities

Seattle is actually a great city to spend Memorial Day weekend in, because we host one hell of a party, known as “Folklife.” Not only is this a great place for food, fun and music but it also has a distinct hippy vibe that comes from our ‘cultural heritage.’ Oh, and lots of weed. LOTS. The best part is that it’s hosted right under the Space Needle and runs the entire weekend, which means FREE fun whenever it fits into your schedule.

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Our second activity for the evening was to seek out something that still had cultural significance, and was completely new for both of us. We found this at the 2016 Madaraka celebration at the Experience Music Project (EMP) downtown. We were pretty happy that this event was taking place and that it was right next to where Folklife was. After enjoying some Folklife funk, we headed over to the EMP. For those of you who don’t know, Madaraka is an Kenyan holiday that’s generally celebrated in June, but we were lucky for enough to be at this celebration, which was benefiting One Vibe Africa (which I would encourage all of you to check out!). We absolutely loved the musicians who represented all different parts of Africa and the African/African American communities in Seattle.

One of our favorite acts was Nik West, who is a brilliant funk goddess and was absolutely brilliant. She’s, perhaps, best known for her work with Prince, and she rocked the stage with a tower of purple hair, braided in mohawk. Check out her videos on YouTube for a taste of her amazing sound. I was so in love that after her first performance all I could say was, “That was perfection.”

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Morning

Sunday started out with a work meeting that I had to go to, but afterward we headed over to our local farmers market for some lunch. Then it was off to the movies! We walked over to our local movie theater for a matinee showing complete with popcorn and juice (because we’re old, yo – soda is so 5 years ago). We chose XMen: Apocalypse for our movie, because every weekend deserves a little bit of geek in it. The movie, we decided, gets a solid 6.5 stars. It was fun to go to, but overall nothing too exciting. I was pretty sad with the lack of character development for Storm, who is basically the reason I went to the movie. Such a loss.

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Dinner Time

After a little British Invasion via “The Great British Bake Off” our next stop was for a little taste of Italy, with a new restaurant called Pasta Bella. We’d never been to this restaurant before, but we were looking for something new and pasta sounded like perfection. The restaurant was amazing. Our starter was out of this world. And was an olive, tomato, onion, garlic dip with toasted butter bread. Amazing. I also had some yummy spaghetti and overall the restaurant will definitely be re-visited. And even better was that we snagged a Yelp $20 voucher!

Movie Night

To top off the night, it was my night to choose a movie and chose to watch Begin Again, which stars Keira Knightly and Mark Ruffalo and was a really fun watch. The story follows a the musical lives of a producer, guitarist, musician, Adam Levine and James Corbin (obv. under different names). It was a really fun movie, and I would definitely recommend watching it, if you guys have the opportunity.

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Relax. We slept in, I got a little bit of work done and that we topped it off with a BBQ with friends. Oh! And I finally finished reading my first Descender volume, which is an amazing comic you should all read. I’m such a firm believer in taking a day of rest, so I was just fine chillin’ out for this day. And there you have it. The end of a perfect weekend. Cheers!