exploress – Page 14 – Darkk Horse Travel

I Have Confidence In Me

Published on September 3, 2014 by EmileeLeave a comment

Life has been pretty hectic, lately, so I’ve decided to put all my would be little updates together in one post. Being an au pair is about as difficult as I thought it would be (and I’m a pessimist, so…). I’m just so glad that I have a couple of years of nannying under my belt so I know that this is normal. Never was there a child and nanny who immediately became best friends with the stranger their parents suddenly tell them to obey. There’s always a transition period, and unfortunately that’s what I’m going through right now.

That being said, I love the little town I’m living in. I wish there were more people my age, since it seems like everyone here is over 50 years old, but the city itself is absolutely beautiful. I’m kind of ok with it being more quiet here, even though I’m used to living in the city. That being said, I miss Seattle with all my heart. But, here’s to making the most out of the relatively short amount of time I’m going to be in France. Can’t wait for this to become the best year, ever!

1. We got a puppy!!

10616653_10203956793173587_3556346518671995813_n — Meet our new Sussex Spaniel, Joplin! (Yes, the same as Janice) He’s such a sweet boy!

Yes he’s the cutest, but he’s also a bit of a brat. This makes the grand total of dogs in this house four, and I’m hoping that will be the last of them. Even though I love dogs, having four running around all day is a bit draining, especially with a howling pup.

2. I visited a castle a couple weeks ago!

This is a video I found that shows the castle I went to the weekend before last. I loved taking pictures, but (of course) video is always so much better. Enjoy!

3. Artists I’m currently in LOVE with:

This is my next book purchase. It’s called “Parissiene” and is by Dominique Corbasson. It’s a bit pricey, ringing up at almost $40, but the illustrations in it are to die for (and, it’s only sold in Europe). Basically it’s going to either be my birthday (which is coming up! September 19th!) or Christmas present to myself. I can’t wait!

I saw this book reviewed online and decided to give it a try! It was originally written in French and is illustrated by one of my new favorites, Isabelle Arsenault. The story was beautiful, and I am absolutely in love with the illustrative style. This book was also my first experience with free 24 hour shipping via French Amazon. It was a win all around 🙂

4. Every time I get nervous about my job…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zfZ5GN9ePBM

^^This is the song I started singing in the airport on my way to France (completely subconsciously), but, of course, there is also the original which I was first inspired by. This song is running through my mind again and again. Spirit of Julie Andrews, help me. (Original version below)

5. We started school!

The first day of school was yesterday and I don’t think any of us could have been more excited. The past week and a half I’ve been with the kids 7am-8pm, which has been brutal. But, I’m glad with the school schedule, I now have some free time to get things done during the middle of the day. Hurray for freedom!

6. Phrases for the day:

You’re in trouble = Tu es en difficulté

If you don’t sleep, there will be no chocolate with snack = Si vous ne dormez pas , il n’y aura pas de goût de chocolat avec le snack.

Why is she crying? = Pourquoi elle pleurait?

Play nice or don’t play at all = Joue gentil ou ne pas joue du tout.

Calm down = Calmes-tu.

How was your day? = Ta journée s’est bien passée? or Comment était ta journée?

Where does it hurt? = Où est-ce que vous avez mal ?

Don’t hit your sister (brother) = Ne frappes pas voter soeur (frére)!

My French is not very good because I’m American = Mon français n’est pas très bon parce que je suis Américaine.

The Peach Dilemma

Published on August 31, 2014August 31, 2014 by EmileeLeave a comment

Some 12,000 tons of peaches and nectarines on Wednesday remained in refrigerators in Imathia – one of seven prefectures affected by the Russian food embargo – with another 13,000 tons of fruit remaining unpicked due to a flood of canceled deliveries.

I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again – I’ve never been very interested in politics, but lately it just seems so much more applicable to my life than it ever did while I lived in the United States. In today’s political trash bin we have the issue of fruit.

Not just any fruit, but fruit grown by French (and other EU) farmers to be exported to Russia. You may not really be following the whole embargo train ( I know I wasn’t before I moved to France), but here’s a little snippet so you’re caught up to speed.

In a nutshell: A bunch of world leaders are acting like spoiled brats, and aren’t playing nice.

Here in France this is an issue because 1 billion dollars worth of exports went to Russia last year, and that money isn’t coming in this year because of the bans. This is especially bad since the French economy was already in a bit of a squeeze, even before the temper tantrums began.

BUT it also means that peaches are damn cheap, here. As are pears and apples. Since there’s nowhere to send the fruit, it’s being overstocked in most stores, so there is no shortage. This seems initially like a great problem to have, but it’s causing serious issues for smaller stores and especially farmers who were depending on the income the sales would produce.

And, overall, these bans and embargoes don’t really seem to be helping anyone, since the Russians are also experiencing problems with food pricing (some places with 60% increases).

Overall, nobody really likes to talk about politics, but enjoying the fruits of this problem are coming at a cost higher than initial thought would assume. I don’t really ever want to be the ignorant American living in another country, unaware of what’s going on in the world around me, so I think it’s important to look into things like this.

While living in Seattle may have made me feel like issues with Russia were on another planet, the reality is it’s now only a bit father than the distance from Alaska to Hawaii for me to get from here to Moscow. If there was a time to start paying attention, it’s now.

Russiasanctionspic — Value of EU agri-food products banned from entering Russia (€m 2013 figures) via The Guardian

Fear Not, For I Am With You

Published on August 30, 2014August 30, 2014 by Emilee1 Comment

10306778_10203039492921654_8288730606284838706_n — The tattoo I have on my left arm I got done months ago. It says “I will face my fear. Only I will remain” in French.

“I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.”

― Frank Herbert, Dune

Before I moved to France, the number one thing people said to me was, “Wow, you’re so brave.” I’ve always thought this was funny, because I would never use that word to describe myself. I was scared as shit to move to France. And even now that I’m living here, I’m terrified of so many things. I’m scared of going to the post office, of buying bread and not knowing how to respond in perfect French when the lady asks me how I’m doing. I’m scared of getting lost when I go on walks, not making any friends, or being in a situation where no one can understand my need for help because they don’t speak English.

These are real fears. But they are also all futuristic and somewhat ridiculous (even though I’m convinced the lady at the bakery is out to get me). Each one of them has the potential of stopping me from thriving while I live in France. They are barriers to happiness. But they are also motivators to making this experience something I’ll remember for the rest of my life. See, each time one of these fears surfaces, I remember what I have overcome to get here.

A year ago I was afraid to breathe. I was unsure who I was, what I was supposed to do with my life, and why it didn’t seem like anything was worth living for, anymore. My heart was broken, two members of my family had been diagnosed with breast cancer within months of each other, and I was floundering in my job and relationships.

There’s a reason they say fear is “crippling.” It doesn’t kill you. It leaves you to fight yourself, daily, in some kind of one sided torture. You feel trapped, isolated and like there’s no one else in the world that could possibly understand. But what’s worse, is that you try to talk yourself out of it. You try again and again to fix it, ignore it, numb it until something – anything takes away the pain of admitting that you need help.

But, we weren’t made to fix ourselves. The broken hearts, the self depreciation, the voices in our heads that tell us it’s impossible to get past this, “There is no future, so why even look forward?”

Instead of moving forward, fear holds us back. It can do more damage to us than any other person ever will. Fear of being alone, of being unwanted or of being unable to achieve the standards we’ve set for ourselves. It paralyzes us, sets us on paths to destroy ourselves through whatever means we use to get rid of it.

I know this, because a year ago this was me. I did everything to try to subdue, freeze, isolate, cover up, conceal and dilute the fear that I felt. Fear that stretched back to childhood. Fears of inadequacy, fear of being unloved – or unworthy of being loved. Fears of never achieving anything. Of the people who had told my mom that for whatever reason (race, gender, socioeconomic standing) I would never amount to anything, being right.

“Don’t be afraid, for I am with you.
Don’t be discouraged, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you and help you.
I will hold you up with my victorious right hand.” Isaiah 41:10

Last year I took a two week long backpacking trip around the UK.

Two weeks is no great pilgrimage. There wasn’t a great cathedral that I would find waiting for me at the end of my journey, and there weren’t any saints to welcome me. But before I left, I decided to take these two weeks to do something crazy – to live in the moment.

You see, fear is of the future, not the present. Danger is in the present, and is very real, but fear? Fear is a manmade, demon of a reality, that will probably never even happen. When we stop worshiping the future, we drain fear of its power.

See, as a Christian, I serve a God of the present, who tells me not to worry about the future, because he’s got it covered (Matt 6:34). Which is awesome, because that gives me so much more creativity, ambition and energy to sow into the present – seeds which will grow and produce a more beautiful future, in the end.

I’m not sure why, but lately I’ve been thinking about fear a lot, and remembering what it took for me to overcome my own demons. I tried and I tried and I tried to fix myself, but it wasn’t until I let go and let God start working that I saw any kind of healing happen. Only after I realized it was ok to be broken, could I begin the process of being mended.

Overcoming fear is as simple and as terrifyingly difficult as acknowledging that it exists. Until you do that, there really is no way of overcoming it. We all have our own unique terrors, each one changing as we grow and evolve as people. But today I’m reminded that where there is brokenness, there are also opportunities for a healing so intensely refreshing, and in some ways, simultaneously painful, that it can do nothing but refine us into a version of ourselves that would otherwise be inaccessible.

So here’s to taking life one moment at a time, and allowing ourselves to grow and transform into the people we are meant to be. It doesn’t happen over night, it’s a daily chore. But it’s in those little moments, when we decide to conquer the now, that we find the strength, over time, to claim the victory we have won.

Screen Shot 2014-08-30 at 3.05.44 PM — The Voyage Of The Dawn Treader by C.S. Lewis

France In Color

Published on August 29, 2014 by EmileeLeave a comment

Taking walks is a huge part of the culture here, in France. It’s the cutest thing to see all of the old people on their walks, or biking with their significant others. Everyone drives in Seattle, but here no one seems to mind taking the longer distance. I’m not sure that I’m onboard with the idea of two walks per day (I love walks, but maybe not that much), but I love grabbing my camera and taking some shots with the kids while we’re out and about.

Let’s Play A Game Called:

Published on August 28, 2014August 29, 2014 by Emilee1 Comment

French food is great, but there have been a few times when I’ve seen things pop up and I wondered what the hell they were. This is the first installment of (probably) many questionable items. Ready, set – here we go.

1. Warm milk: I don’t really understand this, as an American. I don’t think I’ve ever seen milk kept warm, sealed and packaged like this before. Of course, I’ve seen it done with Rice and Soy milk, and the such, but never cow milk…this really surprised me – but who am I to judge?

2. Mayo in a toothpaste tube: Can’t get much better than that, huh? It’s a little bit odd to see this in the fridge, or even being used at the dinner table, but I guess we do have squeezable mayo in the US…it’s just not normally in a tube like this where you literally use it exactly like toothpaste (rolling the end and all).

3. I’m not really sure what’s in the top of this bad boy (maybe honey??) but the bottom is vinegar. There are several bottles like this one in the kitchen, and although you can’t see it – they come apart when you use them individually, and then fit perfectly back together to create (what looks like) a solid bottle.

4. I was a bit concerned with this one when I first saw it squirted into a cup. I’m still not sure what it is entirely, but it’s an add water kind of solution that you then drink. The kids love it!

10514545_10203915662745352_2951873288474420602_n — Somehow I don’t think this would fly in the US…

5. Every morning the kids eat bread, cereal, warm milk and this. Basically it’s like Nestle chocolate milk, but what was the most shocking (obviously I’ve seen chocolate milk powder, before) was the artwork on it…Behold: ———->

6. Little crackers from heaven: Ok, so these little biscuits are the best thing to ever happen on earth. The first time I tried one I almost grabbed the whole package and ate the entire thing. In fact, when I FINALLY go grocery shopping on Saturday I’m going to be grabbing a couple of packets, for sure. Basically they’re like graham crackers/a square of animal cracker like taste with chocolate in between. Because let’s be real – if there’s one thing the French love, it’s their chocolate.

Bumble Bees

Published on August 25, 2014August 31, 2014 by EmileeLeave a comment

Yesterday was the first day that I watched the kids, alone. All three of them. It was pretty hectic, I’m not going to lie. They are all extremely high energy, and the semi-barrier of language made communicating with them a little hard, all around. But aside from them trying to kill each other over UNO and rugby tackling during soccer, it was fun to be able to paint, play some soccer (aka football) and get out of the house.

My favorite part of yesterday was stopping to find time to look some insects. I know it sounds frightfully interesting, of course. But I definitely took some videos of flys (which allow you to get SO CLOSE, here) and some photos, also. After we went to the park, we also found a little flower garden where there were tons of bumble bees (an American name which the kids thought was HILARIOUS), and as the kids found the biggest ones, I hopped around on my camera trying to get the best shots of the fearless insects. Here are some of the fruits of this labor, and some other adventures from yesterday:

The Holy Trinity

Published on August 24, 2014August 31, 2014 by Emilee3 Comments

10616586_10203883529702046_9064390188779260381_n — Church.

Like any given Sunday in the life of moi, this morning I went to church. Being a Christian, and it being Sunday, that fact is a fairly unexciting statistic. But, what made today different, was that “going to church” meant going into a gigantic medieval style stone structure filled marble carved statues (we’re talking 8-10 feet high, including a skeleton reaper which is #hellapunk) in a small French town. Oh, and that it was Catholic. Which I am not.

Now you may think there would be some cultural differences for an American Protestant girl who ducked her way into a party where no one speaks her exact verbal or spiritual language, and you would be right. But overall I felt incredibly refreshed by the experience. The reason I was there in the first place was because it’s the only church within 30 miles of where I live. Not gonna lie – the lack of options is kind of a bummer.

The church service was as traditional and conservative as you could probably find anywhere, complete with a pipe organ and higher than usual pitched singing. It reminded me of church coronations/marriage scenes from Elizabeth or Ever After. But, overall I loved the service. It was pieced together with biblical scriptures and interval hymns (In French, of course, which was amazing) and I loved that it constantly engaged those who were there to worship.

Afterward, I stopped by the flower shop across the street and bought a little purple flower bush to bring some life to my room. It worked. I’m so much happier seeing my little plant ward every time I walk in the door. It really is just the best for someone, like me, who is obsessed with the natural world.

The final excitement for the day happened when I logged in to my favorite websites, Hulu and Netflix, to relax for the evening. Then, to my utter astonishment, from BOTH websites, I was told that they did not work within the country I was operating. As in – there was NO Netflix, Hulu or Pandora in THIS WHOLE COUNTRY. Try to grasp my horror. It was quite severe and really couldn’t have been worse. I’m not ashamed to say it, I adore all of these websites, and being able to relax and watch a movie is essential to bringing together my feeling of home.

I’m starting to realize more than ever that, sometimes it’s the littlest things that make home feels like home. Like Netflix. Or a random little shrub in your room.

I am sorry to sound like a spoiled American brat, but when I first found out I would have no access to Netflix, Hulu or Pandora I was pretty seriously considering booking it out of France…ok, so I wasn’t, but I was pretty upset. I don’t have many of my movies with me here in France, so it’s really important to have these resources. Would I die without them, no. Would I be a lot less happy about life? Yes. LUCKILY, I have amazing friends who let me in on the secret of Chromzising websites and making them work with Hola. I couldn’t be more happy.

Today has been a full and relaxing day, overall. I actually had the guts to tell my host family I didn’t want to go with them, the kids and their grandparents to the park, a decision which needed to be made since it’s my day off and they keep trying to “include me” on these days – which is nice…but I’ll be with the kids this week 7am-7pm every day (school doesn’t start until next week) so I think I’ll have quite enough kid time for the week without going out on my day off. Instead I stayed home and wrote letters to any and everyone I could think of. I ran out of postcards, but I plan on getting more on my next trip outside this petit-chateau.

Also, if you’ve asked me to send you a letter/postcard please please be patient. I’m mailing out the first bunch today, but there are still some people I’ve missed that will have to go out the next time I have the courage to go into the post office and ask for stamps.

Oh, yeah…I have a sauna in my bathroom. As in, the bathroom is only for me and there's a sauna in it. Awesome. — Oh, yeah…I have a sauna in my bathroom. As in, the bathroom is only for me and there’s a sauna in it. Awesome.

Once Upon A Dream

Published on August 23, 2014August 31, 2014 by EmileeLeave a comment

Today was pretty magical. And even though I’m tired from running around, the fact that I’m tired from running around inside of castles makes the fatigue bearable.The castle pictured is the Castle (or Château) of Sully-Sur-Loire and was a medieval fortress for generations of Dukes in this area of France. I would go on and on about my day, but since a picture’s worth a thousand words, I’ll let you see the results, instead.

The First Of Many Days

Published on August 20, 2014August 21, 2014 by Emilee1 Comment

Ok, let’s talk food. Because I live in France now – what else would we be talking about. Since I have arrived there are several things I’ve eaten that I had no idea what they were. In fact, I would say I don’t know what most of my diet is right now. What I do know, is that everything is so good, and smells so good. I can’t even believe how fast the mom for the family whips out these amazing dishes for just a random Wednesday afternoon. But, it’s France – maybe that’s normal.

A lot has happened since I arrived here yesterday, and I’m sure a lot more will be happening, but since I want to make sure I cover everything I’m going to talk about things individually in separate posts throughout the week.

So, let’s talk French food:

Things I’ve eaten since getting here:

1. Tomates Farcies

Sweet Jesus take the wheel, this picture does nothing justice, but last night I ate a variation of Tomates Farcies which is basically tomatoes (and also onions) stuffed with ground hamburger/pork and spices and baked. It was absolutely amazing. I couldn’t believe I’d never eaten it before! Here’s a link to a French recipe (feel free to translate the website by copy and pasting the URL into google translate) more similar to the one I ate, and heres the link to an American variation. Try it out for dinner – you won’t regret it!!

2. Pork Pate

Oh, yes oh yes, the ground up canned rumors are true. Today I ate Pork Pate and it was so good. If you’re looking for an indicator for what it’s like, think canned tuna meets canned cat foot. Delicious, and completely disgusting looking, it’s a must have item for this French family and I love it.

3. Fish Cake

Looks like a banana or zucchini bread, tastes like a grilled tuna sandwich and all around amazing. This is what is known as a Fish Cake (ou Un gâteau au poisson et petits legumes) and yes, it has actual fish in it. Not going to lie, at first I was more than a little unsure about whether or not eating this would be a good life decision. It SO was.

4. Bread:

Have you ever had bread that was fresh baked from the French bakery three doors down from your house? If yes, then you know that even thinking about it is enough to make your mouth water. Something I love about the family I’m living with is that they eat bread, bread and more bread. They eat it for breakfast, lunch and dinner. And even when the main course is bread, there’s still bread on the side. It’s incredible. And an absolutely necessary staple to every meal.

5. Cured Ham:

I don’t actually eat pork, normally. But, since others are cooking, and I’m in France, I’ve decided to make an exception. It was the right decision. This morning we went to the shop across the street and bought some fresh cut ham from a shop that was absolutely darling (like every shop here). One thing that’s nice about this town (but will probably, at some point, also become frustrating) is that there’s not really any such thing as a chain store. This city is a Seattleite’s dream because everything is run by a small business owner. C’est parfait.

6. Croque-monsieur

My first question when this was put on a plate in front of me was: Do I eat it with my hands, or with a fork? The answer, of course, was: Only Americans eat this with their hands. Okay. I’m very lucky I ask more than the average amount of questions, because I feel like there are so many problems that could have already happened without them. But, back to food. This sandwich was out of this world and even though I had it without cheese (because I’m allergic) it was amazing.

Fun Story: When I told my host family that I couldn’t eat cheese, they were stunned. It was as though I told them I was actually missing the right half of my body. All they could say was: Well…we eat a lot of cheese.

C’est la vie.

Stay tuned for more yummy updates!

*All food photos are gratefully borrowed from the Google gods – all rights belong to their original owners.

Here’s to YOU GUYS!

Published on August 18, 2014August 18, 2014 by Emilee2 Comments

Well, here it is – this is not a drill!! I am currently flying over the Atlantic Ocean and in one hour I’ll be landing in Dublin. I may be the most tired little exploress you’ll ever meet, but that doesn’t mean I’m not excited! I’m so happy to get to go back to Ireland (even the airport) and I’m so excited to be half way done with this insane journey.

For those of you who don’t know, I’m taking four flights to Paris because it was half the price of flying direct. Right now I’m on flight number 2, and I’ll have a four hour layover in Dublin airport – then flying to London and finally to Paris.

I pulled an all-nighter before I flew out, which was insane, but necessary. My roommate and I were watching Disney movies and painting up to the LAST MINUTE, getting painted shoes sent out to some customers I had. I am so thankful for her help. I would never have been able to get the shoes done without her selflessness and staying up until 4am with me. If you know Vix, give her a high five next time you see her. She deserves so much more!

So far travel has been pretty smooth. I wandered around the Chicago airport for a while, but eventually found my way to my gate, after going through this magical light walk tunnel. There’s also a dinosaur there (see photo below).

I honestly cannot believe that I’ve actually made it to this point. Things didn’t come together until I was literally walking out the door for my flight, but the point of this story is that they came together. There were so many things that should have and could have gone wrong, but the lesson I’ve learned from this experience is:

It takes a village to make a dream come true.

Without family and friends, I would not be here. Without my mom and sister helping me pack and move boxes. My aunt reminding me to actually buy an adapter. My roommate (again, she wins all the points) my ex-nanny family for helping me financially and the support of so many more. I honestly feel so loved. Yes, I started this climb, but it was others who had to lift me the last way when I was worn out and exhausted.

So here’s to all of you who have stepped out of your way to make mine easier. Whether it was kind words, financial help, helping me move, taking time to come wish me off at a goodbye party, or any other support – THANK YOU. I would not be sitting on this plane today without you all!

Right now I’m half way through this journey, and I’m not sure what’s coming up next, but it has been such an adventure so far and I could not have asked for anything more.

See you IN FRANCE!!